Subject To Change

The cats are gone.

That’s right, no more. Feel free to reference the Monty Python “Parrot” sketch here if it makes you feel better/laugh/care.

I don’t like cats. Having them in my blog was an attempt to pander to you. Unfortunately for you, whoever you may be, I’ve realised I don’t need/like/care about you. So the cats are gone. This blog is more about catharsis and my need to have a blog more than it is my need for anyone to read said blog. So I’ve killed the cats.

Go on, report me to whichever animal loving authority reigns in your neighbourhood. I care not. The cats are gone, I ain’t pandering to any emo tendencies any more either. Wanna kill yourself? Do it. Just don’t bother me with it. Think life sucks? You’re right. Now get on with it or refer to previous point. Want humourous cat pictures? **** off and read icanhazcheezburger or some other lolcats site. I managed to find the goddamn site, I’m sure you can. If all you came here for was the cats, I’m glad to see the back of you. Hopefully floating in some harbour somewhere.

Good week at work, hit targets, made bonus. Happy sheep etc. I also have a bottle of wine and a huge steak, so life couldn’t be much better. I could have a love life, of course, but that generally leads to more complications, so maybe I’m fine with my steak and wine.

This post was brought to you by a random stream of consciousness and no ****ing cats at all. Whatsoever.

The sheep is sick.

That’s right, I appear to have contracted the influenza virus, one of the greatest killers in the history of man (not quite up there with other men and stupidity, but still a rather virulent wee bugger…)

So, all I want to do right now is languish in my haven (bed) and relax (watch the new episodes of House and Boston Legal), but due to my “training” status at work I don’t have this luxury available to me.

So I have to drag my sorry carcass from the safe haven of my friendly goose-feather duvet to the cold, artificially lit place of work that demands my attendance…

Such is the life of a sick sheep…

And as I suffer here today, so must you all…NO CATS!

In fact I’m thinking of phasing out the cats totally, I have a horrible feeling that’s the only reason anyone visits these days. And whilst the joy of hits is mildly addictive, the thought that people come here only for the feline fun I offer is a blow to the ego. Should the ego suffer like that, the id may rear it’s ugly head, and none of us want that now, do we?

So, I got the new job!

This explains my recent lapse in blogging activity, I’ve had to concentrate on more capitalist endeavours as the training programme at my new place of employ is intensive to say the least.

That’s not a bad thing though, as I love learning new things, so I must say I’m really enjoying the new job. This is a new thing for me, as my previous two jobs have been mundane, degrading and contained a fair amount of violence to myself. This one is mentally taxing (a good thing for my easily bored mind), vibrant, full of interesting and fun people and, most importantly, pays well

As an attempt to make up for my lack of activity recently, I provide for your kitty-loving pleasure not one, but TWO, cats! You heard me right, two cats! And just to avoid offending any delicate sensibilities there were no other fluffy/feathered animals harmed in the making of these ones…

I spoil you guys, I really do…